I am typing this post now because I really don’t know who I should turn to. I wonder if anyone is going to read this since I abandoned this page for ages. Maybe no one should. Just maybe.

More than a year ago, L told me that he wanted to quit his job to pursue his dream to start his own business. I supported his decision then as 1. I don’t rely on him financially since day 1;  2. I want to be a supportive partner as much as I can. So he made a quick decision to leave the job, and I just let him do his thing.

Months after he quited the job, L blurt out that he took a loan as a start up fund for his business. I was in shock to hear that, and became worried because I never ever believe in taking loans from banks. Banks are in my opinion just merciless money suckers, killing with their interest alone. When I told L about my concerns over this, he dismissed them by saying that it is common for start ups  to take loans for the business. I can only hope I can trust that he knows what he is doing.

Throughout these times, I picked up bit piece information about what L was working on. I know he went into a few ventures, from building a trading program, to smart home appliances and software, to Wanderhow, to app development, to ecommerce and business consultancy. I probably have missed out a few in between. As far as I know, none has really worked well so far.

Along the way, L borrowed a lump sum from me twice to tide over his finances. I was quite reluctant to lend the second time round, because I was after all supposed to be the safety net of the family. But I am also concerned that we might end up with a bigger debt elsewhere if the money do not come from me. So I did, to give my last financial support to him. Unfortunately, this means that the safety net is non existent as well. My bank savings has reached rock bottom. And above all, I still got to continue supporting the family expenses, which includes the childcare fees, food, expendables, the car instalment, plus my parents’ allowance.

To be honest, this topic has been a sensitive issue when raised. We have debated countless times over it in fact. But L is still dead sure that things will work out somehow as long as he does not give up. Each time I rant to him about my insecurities on our family finances, he would tell me “we will make it”, or bring up about being a Grab driver while he continues to work on his business during the flexi working hours. Though I suggested him to get a stable job several times, it remains his last option.

L would even say, you do know that I will need to travel very often next time right, because the outside world is where the money opportunities are. I don’t know. I don’t want to know. But it seemed that he does not give much thought about the family or what I am going through when he said that, jokingly or not.

I would want to think I have given L his rightful chance to make his dream work as I do not want him to regret in the future. But I honestly have lost faith that this is going to work. I no longer know how to tell him where to draw the line or know when to stop. And what saddens me more is, perhaps due to the stress he faces, he has lost the patience he used to have with us, and no longer treat me the way he did. The constant anguish within the family is seriously draining all our energy..

I feel so suffocated typing till this point. Shall stop.

Week 18 Day 4

Kick kick.. punch punch..

Yesterday, your father finally has a taste of your little movement in the womb after missing it like forever. Good job, girl!

Going into 5th month of pregnancy soon and we're half way there before we knew it. How amazing is it..?

We're seeing you in two days' time! As excited as always! How much would you have grown..? It seems that you're becoming heavier, though I don't look as pregnant as I should be. Hehe.

Jiayou! Jiayou!

16 Jul 2015

14 Jul 2015

It's been so long since I have blogged anything. It almost feels as though I have hopped onto Doraemon's "Time Machine", and zoom.. here I am, at a different time, a different place, and with a vastly different mind. I guess this is what growing up means.

Over the years, my life has changed.. "for the better" may not be the most appropriate word to describe, but rather.. I prefer to think that it is becoming more "complete" as time passes.

10 Jul 2012 ('contd)

On the later part of the day, we went to 五分埔! Ladies, it's like a MEGA "Bugis Street" in Singapore's context and ready or not, you will be spoilt by choices.



I don't think anyone will contest the definition of the place as.. Woman's heaven, aka Men's hell. Unfortunately or fortunately, I hate making choices! Poor Lionel just has to suffer with me =X



The streets are quite narrow, and every once in a while there will be scooters passing through the alley, so it can be quite dangerous..


Tired and hungry from all the shopping? You bet.. (Especially Lionel who has been carrying everything all along aww)

It's pretty coincidental that some tourist actually asked Lionel how to walk to Raohe Ye Shi. Honestly, we didn't even know there is night market nearby. Haha! But since we're here, we figured maybe we will walk there too!



When we reached Raohe Ye Shi, we noticed a long queue for this stall selling Hu Jiao Bing.. and those queueing up for them were buying them in bulks. We are Singaporeans.. so joined the queue LOL!




We initially wanted to buy one to try, but it's plain stupid to queue so long for one (you know how it feels like) so we had three in the end. Hmm.. Maybe I don't know how to appreciate the goodness of it.. Haha! But it's a bit overrated to me!

There's still a super long stretch of road.. with many other stalls :)





.. & we're eventually back in hotel.. looking at our wins for the day :)

10 Jul 2012

We're both so excited! We're going to this place that we've always wanted to go, and it's probably a shame to call ourselves Jay Chou's fans if we are here in TW but have not been there.

It's a special trip for us, and you know it when you see two person who usually wear the most casual throughout suddenly look different for the day. Hehehe!

Need I say where is it? Shh.. Secret.

9 Jul 2012

TW.. is sooo hot during summer. Almost as warm or even warmer than in Singapore. We are so grilled. But that does not stop the hungry us from looking for good food.

First meal for the day is the much recommended Hu Xu Zhang "Lu Rou Fan"! Nom nom nom..


You won't believe how fast they actually serve their dishes. ONE MINUTE! Basically it's almost like your order will reach you immediately from some magic pocket after you told the waiter what you want. And most importantly of all.. it taste.. GREAT! A must-try, I would say.. My favourite is the bowl of rice :D


After we reached the top floor, the whole of Taipei is just before our eyes. We were given something that looks like a walkie-talkie, and it is supposed to describe the various scenaries around Taipei.

For the first few stations, I listened faithfully. Towards the back.. I kind of gave up and just went roaming around seeing what interests me. Only Lionel listened throughout, but I bet he don't remember half the things he heard now :X




This is the protruding corner of the building which I dare not walk towards because it's so freaking scary. Yet look how happy the boy is..

& the mascot of Taipei 101.. for some reasons it's just so cute to me. Hehehe.




When evening comes, we were at Xi Men Ding! Before we were there, Darling told me that XMD is like Singapore's Orchard Rd. It turned out to be quite true! At least the feel of walking down the streets..



Dinner was a bit of anything we find again. We began with dessert, which I know is abnormal and don't ask me why this is so. It just happened. Haha!

Had strawberry shaved ice which is not too bad (though I still prefer my mango). *spouts at the delinquent-looking waiter who took the wrong order* Shared some weird pot with chicken and seafood. Err.. No comments about that. Joined the crowd for some Mee Sua.. I think it's quite nice.. but Lionel don't agree. Hehehe.


Wait and wait.. About 15 minutes later..
















Ready to see how it turns out to be?














What if I say.. I don't want to show you leh!













HAHA, okay I am just kidding.














Here it is!





Omg.. Do we really look like that? If yes, Lionel had really muscular legs.. A ridiculously sticking-out ass.. And his skeleton hands print on his shirt looks like "三八". HAHAHAHA! I think I laughed like for forever.